In My Life

If you've picked up on my theme of making my blog post titles from songs that matter to me and(or) relate to the subject matter at hand, you'll be correct in guessing this is a little blog (not about Jack and Diane) but about memories. I finished a game I've been playing for a few months. Most of the games I play have a story component even if they aren't linear, and they all tend to take me quite some time to play through. Sometimes its life, sometimes its rage quitting because I really am a horrible gamer and not touching the console for a few weeks, sometimes its because I'm playing on one of the systems that someone else is also playing on and I want to make sure I'm not monopolizing the toy or someone else's free time activities. I typically play late at night after everyone else is in bed, early before they get up, or in a rare down moment during the weekend when everyone else is either watching football or just not wanting to be in the space I tend to want to play. I play to clear my mind much as I workout. I can pop in a good game and get lost for a bit and not think about the world around me, escapism at its finest (I also read quite a bit, but I'm in a hella reading rut right now and haven't found anything that I NEED to read since this summer when I was reading novellas about a murder robot). One of the things I do when I finish a game is I reflect on what life has been like over the course of my play through. People I've met, or lost touch with, relationships that have changed, moments that filled me with joy, with frustration, with anger, major decisions I've made, major changes that have happened around me. This game had a lot. A lot of all of the things. My favorite game ever I played through the pandemic and I'm still not sure if I love it as much because its really just the best game ever made, or if escaping to vast world of Hyrule felt like escaping everything that was going on in the world and in my personal life. This game was from the same franchise as my favorite, but its from the same series. Its a series I've play since I started gaming in the 90's. Hearing the original melody play watching the credits roll (yeah I watch game credits, make fun of me later) I reflected not just on my life over the past 4ish months but on my life and all the memories that I have just surrounding games. Tetris battles, playing with my brother, playing with friends, watching my friends play, talking about games with people. Honestly like everyone else I've had a rough few years for some of the same reasons and for some different reasons and while I had some real sadness in my reflection...I also thought about how this hobby of mine has enriched my life. You won't find me streaming my play (it's basically me saying what the hell, calling myself an idjit/dumbass, or saying shit on repeat as an enemy beats the heck out of me) I am self professed to suck, but I will say that I am so grateful for the technology. Because it's given me so much joy over the years, its given me so many memories, and if I hadn't played games I don't know that I would have found my way into this new career field that I really do enjoy. I'm melancholy because it really has been tough for a while, but I have so much more than others and I need to learn to find joy in what is and to stop letting the world around me hurt so much. I have my next game lined up, and when I'm ready I'll pop it in and explore a new world and get lost in it. But for now I'm going to enjoy my accomplishment and remember that no matter the hard memories the good ones matter more.